The Order Awards 2006
The big ones** **Who is the God King of the **Order**?** This year's God-King is, without a doubt and how could it be any different, **Gerko**! Our traditional God-King of the **Order** managed to beat the competition with 6 votes total, despite a strong fight from runner-up Luke, who got no less than 4 votes. The third place cup will have to be shared by suliK, Azure Stone, Wooz, Yamu, Malkavian and Vimes. And also traditionally, the now clinically insane Bullock got one vote for God-King, for inventing this great tradition for us to steal. One person abstained or, rather, voted for himself in this don't-vote-for-yourself category. **Who is the coolest member?** I guess that kind of depends on your definition of cool, considering the winners. Still, congrats to **Azure Stone**, the winner with 3 votes of the numero-uno Orderite in coolness (coolity?), but sitting on that throne as well is our good friend **Luke**, who also got 3 votes. Followed closely by Yamu and Wooz at 2 votes to the man. Lauren, Mohrg, Gus, Vimes and suliK follow at 1 vote each. The Vault Dweller also got a vote in this category, and two people abstained. **Who is the sexiest member?** Sexy is as sexy does. Schockingly both first and second place were won by girls. Members in denial or generally not gay, it matters now a whit to **The Commissar/Lauren**, a convincing winner and Miss Orderite at 5 votes (though I personally don't think I've ever seen her face (or her ass, for that matter), but I'm sure this is not true for the rest of you lot). Followed at some distance by our actually unseen hot chickzor Skenvoy at 2 votes. Trailing behind are Jebus, Kharn, Gus, Colt, Malkavian, Luke, Wooz and Phauxe Kitsune/Scotty the Great at 1 vote a head. 2 people abstained. **Who is the most Orderite of all Orderites?** A man to be held up as a shining example to the rest of us Orderites, he who personifies our community is...**Luke** at a convincing 4 votes! Almost as Orderite but not quite is Jebus at 3 votes, and suliK at two. Fourth placers are Yamu, Malkavian, Elissar, Kotario, Ozrat and Sander at 1 vote each. 1 person abstained. **OMFG, TEH BLIND! (Fugliest member)?** Better not look in the mirror for it may crack, **Ozrat**, or so 5 of our voters dictated. But fear not, you're in good company as you are trailed by Malkavian who got 4 votes! Following Malkavian and Ozrat in ugliness is Kotario at 3 votes, followed by the number 4 John Uskglass at 2 votes. Off the radar are suliK and Elissar with 1 vote a head, or rather a face. The Vault Dweller received 1 vote and one person cowered before the might of all the ugly and abstained. **Preferred member to meet in real life, if any?** As Tom Hanks unconvincingly trying to play a bookstore manager once typed "Do you think we should meet?" "Yes," is the answer 3 voters would give to **Kharn**, but nearing him are Wooz, Luke, Ozrat and Malkavian at 2 votes pp. Jebus, Azure Stone, Mohrg and John Uskglass all follow at 1 vote a head. 1 person abstained and 2 persons wouldn't wanna meet any of us freaks. **Member most likely to be banned someday.** A glimpse into the future? Let's hope not for **Malkavian**, as no less than 11 of our crystal ball-reading Orderites think his banning is quite likely. suliK and the Overseer follow at 2 votes, trailed by invalid votes for Psychosniper and Dragonetti. 1 person abstained. **The smart ones** **Which member bears the heaviest burden of intellect?** A convincing win for **Kharn** at a total of 11 votes, followed by his arch-rival John Uskglass at 3 votes. Conspiracy-man Ratty is third with 2 votes, with 1 non-valid vote for alec and 1 vote saying we're all stupid. **Which member bears the lightest burden of intellect?** A difficult question to answer for many, but won in the end by **suliK**, who beat John Uskglass in this category 4 votes to 3. Following the two is Kharn at 2 votes. Paladin Solo, Mohrg, Rusty Skull, Jebus, Dove, Ratty and tEd walk the line behind them at 1 vote. Two votes went to the Vault Dweller. **Who has the biggest carrot up his ass?** What is it about Europeans? Well, they stick vegetables up their ass, say a total of 8 voters dividing their votes equally between **Kharn** and **Jebus**. Followed by two people who often use this forum as a personal sparring ground; Malkavian and Kotario at 3 votes each. Behind them is John Uskglass at 2 votes, followed by Dove and Paladin Solo at 1 vote each. **Member with the generally 'best' (though not necessarily most well-formed) opinions?** Intelligence has little to do with good opinions or at least only in a random way, as this award ended up tied between **Kharn** and **suliK**. Following them are Jebus and Luke at 2 votes each, followed by Ozrat, Yamu, Ratty, Sander and John Uskglass at 1 vote a head. 3 people abstained. **The less big ones** **Who has the coolest nick?** Our old and esteemed member **Randall Flag** is not just old and esteemed, but also has the coolest nick, together with the less old but equally esteemed **Wooz**, both at 3 votes. Oh well, Wooz, maybe you'd won if you had kept the 69. Kharn holds the second place with 2 votes. Jebus, Elissar, the Commissar, Fyu-jon!!!, KSM, Tone Capone, Locke Taelos, suliK and Malkavian all hold a fragment of the third place cup at 1 vote each. 1 person abstained. **Who has the coolest avatar?** What a mess of tied voting this one was, but in the end the award went to Scrooge McDuck with 3 votes, way to go **Luke**. Gus' old favourite won second place with 2 votes, following by Jebus, Ratty, Ozrat, Mikey, Azure Stone, the Overseer, Elissar, Pipboy200, Rusty Skull, Murdoch and tEd with 1 vote each. 2 people abstained. **Who has the coolest sig?** Not nearly as tough a call as the avatar one, this one goes to **Wooz** with 4 votes. Following him are Kharn, Azure Stone and Mikey at 2 votes each. suliK, Gus, Ratty, Luke and Lauren all got one vote in this category. 3 people abstained. **Who has the worst sig and/or avatar?** This one was won most convincingly by Dragonetti at 8 votes. It's a shame we can't give him the award and force him democratically to get rid of those eyesores as he's not an Orderite, so it goes to runner-up **Skenvoy**, who got 2 votes. Kharn, Mikey, Clercqer, MadDog, suliK and eom all got 1 vote. 2 people abstained. **Who posts the funniest spam?** A great year for our number one spammer as he won this award with a number of votes only one other award-winner got. 12 votes went to our King of Jokes, **suliK**. Mikey and Gus trailed at 1 vote each. Non-members Jarno Mikkola, alec and Mr Nudge got 1 vote each. One vote was cast on DDR, but I have no idea who that was supposed to be. DDD perhaps? **Who always gets the jokes last?** Many slowpokes in our community according to those of quicker wits, but the winner is not one of our community, but rather our guest the Vault Dweller with 4 votes. The number one place amongst actual Orderites is shared by **the Overseer**, **Kotario** and **Paladin Solo** at 2 votes each. Malkavian, Dove, John Uskglass, Ratty and suliK all got 1 vote. 3 people abstained. **Who is the most ignored Orderite?** We love him, but we pay no mind to him, the most ignored Orderite is **Fireblade** at 4 votes, followed by eom, Rusty Skulls, mrmodem and Clercqer at 2 votes each. Colt, Locke Taelos, Murdoch, MadDog and DSM Madness also do not get enough loving, say the people voting for them (1 vote a head). 1 person abstained. **The random ones** **Who is most likely to be destroyed by a vengeful act of God?** Better watch out, **suliK**, God might hear of this award and decide to finally smite you. Same goes for John Uskglass and the Commissar, who got 2 votes each. Kotario, Kharn, Jebus and Ozrat better be careful and say their prayers too, getting 1 vote each. 1 person abstained, no doubt for fear of God himself. **Who do you think masturbates most?** Ah, ye're such a wanker, **Kotario**, according to 4 of our voters. No big surprise there. Number 2 in masturbation-land is Ratty with 3 votes, followed by Ashmo, John Uskglass and suliK with 2 votes each. Luke, Paladin Solo, Ozrat and the Commissar also know the right buttons to push (on themselves), one vote for each. 1 vote went to alec. **Who would you rather have killed?** Oh dear, let out the vituperation. Better hope we don't get the money to hire a ninja monkey army to get you, **suliK**, because 3 people would. Dove, the Overseer and John Uskglass also might want to thread lightly, 2 votes a head. Elissar, Kharn, Rusty Skull, Ratty, Jebus and Kotario will also need to sleep with one eye open tonight. 2 people abstained, one person voted for Jane Fonda, which is very justifiable. **Who do you think is the most successful IRL?** What has he got? More money? More cars? More women? I don't know, but the award goes to **Murdoch**, who got 4 votes total. Our helicopter-flying compadre Elissar is second with 3 votes, followed by Wooz and Luke at 2 votes each. Pope Viper, Kharn, Dove, Gerko, Pipboy2000 and KSM might be deemed mildly succesfull. One person thought the question so ludicrous that all he could reply with was "Hah!" **Who is most likely to join a LSD cult?** One might suspect he's already in an LSD cult, our absent hippy **Ozrat** and 6 people certainly think it's likely. Second one to fall for the lure of drugs would be John Uskglass, with 5 votes. tEd follows with 2 votes. Pipboy2000, Sander, Malkavian, Ratty and Tone Capone got 1 vote each. **Who is Miss Congeniality?** Does this mean that when he puts on a dress he looks like Sandra Bullock? Theoretically possible, but I'm not sure. In any case, our Miss Congeniality is **Jebus**, our resident drag queen, so say 6 voters. Following him are Dove, who looks great in a dress, and Ozrat, who wouldn't look great in anything, at 2 votes each. Clerqer, Gerko, The Commissar, MadDog and Luke follow at 2 votes each. 2 people voted for the Vault Dweller, who sadly still gets no **awards** for it, 1 person abstained. **Who is the best non-Orderite poster?** A fierce fight of tooth and claw amongst our guests, won in the end by none other than **alec**. Following him in non-Orderite popularity are Per and the Vault Dweller at 3 votes each. Third place goes to Dragonetti and Jarno Mikkola at 2 votes a head. Consolation ribbons will be awarded to the DirtyDreamDesigner and Roshambo. Scotty the Great/Phauxe Kitsune got a vote, but I can't count it since he's still technically an Orderite. 1 vote went to "that Australian guy" **Parrot Rank of the Year Award (lasts one month)?** What was that, **Jebus**? Squawk? Yeah, I thought so. The only other person to win by a convincing 12 votes was indeed our very own Jebus. Hope you enjoy the rank, Jebus! Follow-ups are Clercqer, Kharn, Ratty and John Uskglass. 1 person abstained, 1 person voted for Jarno Mikkola. Total tally of **awards**, regular gold medal winners here: suliK 5 Kharn 4 Luke 3 Jebus 3 Kotario 2 Wooz 2 Ozrat 2 Azure Stone 1 Gerko 1 The Commissar 1 Malkavian 1 Randall Flag 1 Skenvoy 1 The Overseer 1 Paladin Solo 1 Fireblade 1 Murdoch 1